98 Drops of Sarcasm and Wisdom From My Facebook Posts
These made me think: am I able to live with myself?
Between the autumn of 2009 and today, I got married, had a child, changed several jobs, changed homes, cars, and phones. Among all of these things, I used Facebook to put down my thoughts: some of them sarcastic, some full of normality. Sometimes, I might have even touched on wisdom.
I have downloaded my Facebook history and here’s my collection of the most insightful 98 posts, grouped by interests.
Love and Relationships. Family and Home.
- Becoming mature, in men, means regaining that seriousness with which, as children, we play.
- Women have the genuine ability to curiously ask you a question and then ignore you completely, with style, while you answer.
- When men think they are seduced, actually women are tenderly disarming them.
- When a woman is not capricious, this means she doesn’t feel charming.
- Behind every man (strong or not) it is an obsession (most often, for a woman).
- Nothing can be harder for a man than an unattractive, sad, and screaming woman.
- Inertia is when, having left home for days, you wake up in the morning holding the pillow in your arms.
- A second chance to make a good first impression is like love at first sight: it’s possible, but it’s harder, and they both have to want it.
- Singularity (technological) is when computers learn to outsmart men; just like women did years and years ago.
- In general, I don’t like to compliment. I did it to a person a few years ago. Now we are married and we have a kid.
- Getting married when you’re young is like when your mother feeds you and you don’t even know you’re hungry.
- The wedding is more a celebration of hope rather than of love.
- Anarchy is disobedience and non-recognition of any authority or other controlling system…, except for your wife. Else, it would be pure madness.
- The gravity of a husband’s mistake is not given by its magnitude, but by how much the wife cares about that subject.
- You know she really is your wife when, in all the noise on the beach, you hear her laughing on the sand as she is far away in the water. Laughter or screaming. Well, more screaming.
- No one is always right, not even women. Also my wife, for example, was wrong once, but this was back in 2005 before we even met.
- Yesterday, someone told me that nothing should change after having kids. Today, I still can’t stop laughing.
- The disadvantage of being a family: we have nothing to bet on, as we have all things in common.
- Disneyland is Las Vegas for kids.
- A mad cop is when the good cop and the bad cop are the same people. The same in parenting.
- If someone asked me what my role at home is, I would say I am an honorary board member with no voting rights.
- At home, we learned to share our decision-making. I take the ones she already agrees with.
Innovation, Technology, and Problem Solving
23. If you have a big problem, divide it is very-very small pieces so that each one of them is no longer a problem
24. The best ideas are the ones that are so simple that they are elegant.
25. I don’t know what I did before the internet.
26. Any new and sufficiently advanced technology is impossible to differentiate from magic.
27. If you don’t have a solution, change the problem.
28. Wanna bet that the first cloned celebrity will be Michael Jackson?
29. Ideas are bulletproof.
30. ‘Robots’ are as smart as we want them to be.
31. If we consider the world’s potential, nothing has been invented yet.
32. I don’t believe in multi-tasking, I believe in the rapid changing of the focused effort from one problem to another.
33. Smartphones are the new cigarettes. Sitting is the smoking of our generation.
34. Those that have a job, don’t have time to make money.
35. “Criminal organizations are faster because they don’t forgive inefficiency.” — The Young Pope
36. Those who keep saying that the Future is Now, are living in the Past.
37. The true, unique, and essential skill that we all should have, in the next decade or so, is the ability to remember the passwords to all our accounts, while changing them every 3 months, to something different than the last 5 passwords we used.
Contemporary with myself.
38. If you’re not hungry-curious, you’re losing something.
39. There are many wrong ways in life. Be careful which one you choose.
40. I’d like to help you learn to help yourself — this should be the motto of our educational system.
41. There are no objective people; only fairly subjective.
42. You can fool a lot of people for a short time, or a few people for a long time, but you can’t fool everyone indefinitely.
43. The more words you use, the less smart you are. It means you can’t create with few resources.
44. Everybody wants to ‘leave from work in time’, but nobody wants to ‘start work in time’.
45. We’re all different in similar ways.
46. I prefer micro-complexity, rather than a banality at the macro level.
47. The best things in life are not things.
48. People who do not have their own will, become the result of their education only.
49. If you can read what’s written here, thank a teacher.
50. Young people come to power when they are fatally no longer young.
51. Can’t climb a ladder with your hands in your pockets.
52. Perfection exists. But it is relative and must be very clearly defined in time and space.
53. Improvement is when you find a solution to a problem that you don’t have.
54. It’s very easy to balance work and life when you don’t have a life.
55. You need to do the necessary things, when they are needed, in order to get to do what you want, when you want.
56. Legend has it that, in fact, toothpaste never ends. We are the ones who lose our will to squeeze the tube.
57. “Money doesn’t make you a bad person; it just makes you more of who you are.”
58. Success overnight usually comes after 10 years of work.
59. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
60. If you ask them, all the pessimists will tell you that they are just realists.
61. Life is like a party in a bad neighborhood: you either have fun, or are afraid.
62. Danger is real. Fear is a choice.
63. The truth is always somewhere in the middle, but never exactly in the middle.
64. Laziness is the most supreme form of self-respect.
65. “You can’t make a flower grow by pulling on it.”
66. If you want to be remembered (have your picture and quote shared on social media) say something important, but say it in a concise and funny way.
67. Scientists say they’re very close to curing baldness. Who said it’s a disease? Who told them to find a cure? Maybe it’s the next step in human evolution, and we want to cure it?!?
68. “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be uploaded to the cloud.”
69. “Literacy is the process by which a person comes to know the entire keyboard.”
70. Passion is the love for things that do not breathe.
71. Why should we question everything?
72. A great poker player is like the Queen of England: must be able to spend over half a century in a position where all eyes are on him, without showing any emotion.
Self Reflection and Beliefs.
73. Beauty has its defects, in the same way in which imperfection has its beauty.
74. A line is a dot that went for a long walk.
75. Make a fool of yourself at least once a day.
76. God might be a man, but is a gentleman.
77. It’s almost impossible not to smile when you light a fire.
78. “Sometimes there is no right thing to do. You just have to choose the sin you can live with.”
79. “People say youth is wasted on the young. I disagree. I believe wisdom is wasted on the old.” — Red Reddington (The Blacklist — TV Series)
80. There’s no other thing as serious as fun.
81. All you love is need.
82. I don’t want to tell my child what to believe. It doesn’t seem normal to me to raise him in a certain doctrine just because that’s how I grew up. I want to explain to him, in the best way I can, and when he’s old enough to be able to choose by himself between ‘Game of Thrones’ and ‘Lord of the Rings’.
83. Emotion is a terrible substitute for truth.
84. Once in a while stop and ask yourselves: have we become what we, someday, dreamt?
85. At least half of my emotional maturity is based on the movie “Inside Out.”
86. Intentionally bombastic phrases, plastic expressions hyperbolized to the extreme, which unnecessarily use excessive neologisms, and which are repetitive in the essence of the main idea, are characteristic of ‘small’, unprepared people.
87. Don’t you also believe that we don’t really need anyone’s approval to be p… You know what, never mind.
88. For this Halloween, I’m gonna be an extrovert: all outgoing and socially confident. No one’s gonna know it’s me.
89. The sense of humor is like cholesterol. It can be inherited genetically, it can be good, it can be bad, but anyway it should be kept within normal limits.
90. “Three-quarters of adults claim they are more open-minded than the average person.”
91. “The photos you delete are the real you.”
92. As we grow older, words like good, simple, and calm appear more and more often in our vocabulary.
93. Your playlist says a lot more about you than your zodiac sign.
94. All the characters in your dreams are you.
95. Artists are that category of creative people, in whom the hand manages to reproduce with the greatest precision what the mind imagines. The others, we’re creative in vain.
96. “When people sing together, they don’t fight.”
97. The greatest failure is giving up on your dreams.
98. I feel sorry for those who only take life seriously.
This activity, of going through all my Facebook history, was full of memories and recalls of precious moments. I encourage you to do the same and see what you learn about you. It’s a process of looking back and in the mirror, at the same time.
2020 quarantine has forced each of us to answer one of the fundamental questions of life: are we able to live with ourselves? This exercise is not far from that.